on speaking to 20-year old me

20-year old me

The above images were captured more than twenty years ago.  Ouch.  As I think back to that time, I wish it were possible to speak to Young Me.

More than that…

I wish I could speak to her in a way she would listen.

Despite what anyone said, I was determined to do things MY way.  I rarely accepted advice, even from those who were deeply concerned for my health and well-being.

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Perhaps leaving Young Me an anonymous gift would have softened her up a bit – a flowery ruled journal, Garden of Eden incense, and list of questions might have gotten the ball rolling.  Questions like:

1.  Do you feel like you’re running in circles instead of moving forward in life?
2.  What are you afraid of?
3.  If you knew that life could be exciting on its own without creating drama, would you choose that path?
4.  What are you afraid of?
5.  Are you open and honest in your relationships or do you keep parts of your self and life hidden?
6.  What are you afraid of?
7.  You feel God tugging at your heart, speaking gently to you about the things you do in secret.  Are you trying to hide from Him, too?
8.  What are you afraid of?
9.  Where do you think true contentment, lasting peace, and joy come from?
10.  What are you afraid of?

Young Me spent several years making and cleaning up messes because she was afraid of moving forward in life.  She was afraid she might fail.  Afraid that someone might get too close and discover the truthincluding God.

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Because of this, my heart aches for young ladies who hurting.  I pray for their hearts because I remember what it was like not to listen – to believe you know better than your parents, teachers, doctors, and any other living soul bold enough to approach you in love.

My advice to those of you with a struggling young lady in your midst?  Ask questions to get the ball rolling, then LET GO.  No forcing.  No finger-wagging.  No shaming.  Make yourself available.  And most importantly, pray for their hearts.

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